INSIGHT: Difficult Parents or Difficult Children?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Normally parents keep on complaining about their children as difficult children to manage. Who is difficult - parents or children? Let us keep one thing in mind that children are intelligent and not fools. The problem is that at times we adults treat them as fools, and then they decide to respond as fools only.
The best time to talk to the child is when he is in no active mood. Sit in a comfortable environment and tell him that you have regards for him and trust his wisdom. Let us not discuss him as a person but discuss his behavior. Ask him whether he loves his parents or not. In that mood, he will surely say yes only. Let him know that with that kind of negative behavior from his side, you as his parent feel hurt.Further ask him does he want to hurt his parents. In that environment he will say NO. Repeat that you have regards for him and trust his wisdom. Ask him to behave in a way so that you as a parent do not feel hurt at all. In the end of this interaction, thank him. It is important for parents to give respect to their children.


Learning through Humor
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I was short of money while visiting my brother, and borrowed $50 from him.  After my return home, I wrote him a short letter every few weeks, enclosing a $5 check in each one.  He called me up and told me how much he enjoyed the letters, regardless of the money; I had never written regularly before. Eventually I sent off a letter and the last five-dollar check.  In my mail box the next week I found an envelope from my brother.  Inside was another $50.

Learning
At times, to enjoy and add value to a relationship it is a must to initiate some form of give and take even without the formal need otherwise.


Your Questions of the Fortnight
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ryan W, Ontario, Canada
Winning
Question: What about some great first date ideas that aren’t tacky, but show that you want to get to know her?
Answer: The best idea is to be alert about her life situations. WHEN she is in some emergency that is the best time for the first date. Look after her needs and be with her as per her situation till she is back to her normal self. Here you see, she has the best opportunity to feel and understand you and also be understood - which indeed is the purpose of the date.

Julia C, California
Question:
I have not kissed anyone before in the real sense. I therefore seek one kiss tip from you.
Answer: Kiss means an expression of your love and commitment. So focus to kiss the mind and soul of the person you love. More I will share if required. AND first kiss must be practical KISS (Keep It Short & Sweet).

Ashley Wright, San Francisco
Question:
I feel I am in love with a girl and want to marry her too but how to initiate the relationship? She knows nothing about my feelings at all.
Answer: Initiating a relationship is like initiating a sales call. And sales is just one part of marketing. Your relationship needs to go through the whole of marketing process. Just to be brief: Identify your strong points and present those properly, that too only those strong point which directly match her needs. IT CLICKS IMMEDIATELY. More I will share if required.

Augustus, Romania
Question: 
My friends normally tell me that before confirming to a long-term relationship courtship is a must. What is courtship?
Answer: Let us feel the true meaning of courtship. This word has two words - court and ship. See what happens in the legal courts. Courts are meant to feel the view of both the parties and then arrive at a decision. Same is required here. Both man and woman must have the open opportunity to share their individual-self with each other: their personalities, needs, future goals and so on. And then the correct and relevant decision happens. AND as ship is away in the sea far from the cities so SHIP here means that both have an un-interrupted environment to share self.

Selina Landon, Rhode Island
Question:
I wonder if anyone felt hate and love together as one? Its happened to me once before and the feeling is really strange. The balance leaves a total allowance for both to exist and somehow it feels very comforting yet stressing. I am confused. Please guide.
Answer: Love and hate can never go together. Yes at times there is a wishful feeling to love or be loved but that is again not love. Lust and hate are always together - opposite sides of the same coin indeed. At times certain people under the cover of love are nurturing lust and then when what they want is not achieved, they experience hatred.

Sofia, Spain
Question:
I want to understand what is the exact meaning of a calculated risk?
Answer: Risk is the expression used when something is missing in planning; and planning is based on the correct and relevant information available. If we see in simple terms, the whole life itself is a risk as we do not have complete information about future and perhaps so many concerned issues also. In worldly terms, calculated risk means that you have invested yourself with the proper planning within your resources. But of course what formally does not belong to you must never be put to risk.