In life, people face so many unmanageable situations which they call problems. One needs 100% concentration to deal with these problems but that doesn’t happen with most people. Every problem has its own response time which can vary from say to even one year or more as well. The fact is before the response time of one problem is over another problem comes which again has its own response time and so on. Thus there is an overlapping of response times. As a result, one is unable to give 100% concentration to any of the problems. So what to do?
The focus must be to reduce the response time to the minimum because if not managed then the response time becomes the tension time. And if the response time is reduced to say one minute or less for every problem situation then there will not be any overlapping at all. The only way to reduce the response time to the minimum is to develop the habit of taking correct and quick decisions – correct as of the first step.
Focus on 10 problems and 10 minutes approach. The method is to keep on writing all of your problems and keep one time fixed as problem-solving time. Tackle all the problems in a row one by one. Because every problem is different so you will gradually develop the habit to make correct and quick decisions. Same way for your meetings in the office, call 10 people at one time only say 11 am and talk to each one – one after another. This way you will be able to reduce your response time to the minimum and at the same time, you will be able to give 100% concentration to each person or the situation.
Praising someone is a very delicate subject so must be done carefully. Please never praise for the sake of praising. Seek qualities of the other person like a hunter because the first point is to praise only the qualities of the person – quality practically means where the person has invested his time and energy to develop something. Be specific while praising. A clear and precise focus is essential. Only one point at a time and during that time nothing else must be discussed.
Be Honest because dishonest praise is flattery which practically nobody likes. Even a weak person will prefer to have genuine praise only. Be brief because if you keep on praising for a long time they feel embarrassed and you have often heard this expression, “please stop pulling my legs”. The maximum time to praise is 30 seconds or say a maximum of 50 words only. Sometimes even a thumb sign is enough which means well done.
Convey true feelings that are different from being honest. Being honest is a fact while your true feelings about how you feel about their achievement is rather important and touching their heart. Be spontaneous but at the right moment so that the person can feel the power of your praise and the most important is to ask a linked question and listen intently as that helps the person understand that you understand him – that’s the power of praise.
A manager was ambitious and wanted to become a leader. On his next assignment, he focused to generate closeness with his subordinates. But alas the distance was gone. His subordinates took him for granted, ignored his instructions, and took him for a ride. He never wanted to get closeness at this heavy cost. So during his next assignment, he focused to maintain distance. Now people were afraid to talk with him and were avoiding him most of the time. He was confused. He didn’t know what to do. One day he came across this statement. Almost everybody in this world has one common problem, “Nobody understands me”. And when you will help him understand that you understand him then he will feel close to you.
People feel they are understood in two situations. One when you praise them and second when you listen to them. So praise them genuinely, ask a linked question, and listen intently. This way you will be able to generate closeness in the relationship. One word replacement for the distance is respect. This means the other person must respect you under all circumstances.
It is wisdom never to share your personal feelings or situation with other people unless you trust them 100%. This is the best way to develop closeness and yet maintain distance.
Reprimand is a mild scolding. Reprimanding is a highly delicate subject. When people reprimand others they have three focus areas in their minds.
First is that the other person must realize one’s mistake. Second that he must be immediately motivated for future good performance and third that he develops more regard for them because they are helping them be successful. But what happens is just the reverse. The person is not focusing on his performance but on your negative behavior, his mood is off and he is feeling demotivated to work for the next 3-4 days, and respect simply out of question. Remember that there is a difference between a person and his recent performance. The so-called wrong has been done at the level of performance and people tend to attack the person only which is not fair. So while reprimanding, discuss the performance only and never the person.
Then wrong in whose eyes? It’s too judgemental. Who decides? Age is no criteria to decide about right or wrong. Till your goal is decided the right or the wrong can never be decided.
If your performance is matching the direction of your goal it is right otherwise it is wrong or simply unacceptable and remembers that nobody plans to commit mistakes – mistakes just happen and reprimand is not meant when some mistake happens. It is wisdom to forgive others even for those mistakes which might happen after 50 years because the fear of mistakes leads to mistakes. Crime can be planned but never a mistake.
Learning to unlearn the stressful habits is a must because otherwise there will be a clash within your mind between what to do and what not to do. By definition, habits are something you do automatically, without any formal planning. Habits take years to be developed so is difficult to undo. But remember everything in life is difficult before that becomes easy.
It’s important for you to recognize that the old established understanding is no longer relevant or effective. You need to develop the relevant strategic planning to learn to unlearn your unwanted stressful habits. Ask yourself a question, “Why do I want to unlearn this habit?” Make an elaborate list of possible harmful effects of that particular habit and if you want to unlearn certain stressful habits then at the same time also decide which positive cum constructive value you want to adapt in your life.
Your habits have been programmed during the past many years so every time you implement your stressful habit, stop and remind yourself of the harmful effects of that particular stressful habit and promise to yourself that you will not repeat that in the future.
Perhaps you are aware that it is a must to repeat that unlearning process at least for 28 days because it takes a minimum of 28 days before a habit is formed. While promising not to implement that stressful habit also develop a clear concept of the value you want to adapt. In the same way, implements the new constrictive habit at least for 28 days.
Many people are confused regarding the right application of two expressions – aptitude and attitude. Aptitude is the potential of a person to do certain things due to the natural or the inborn ability or accumulated knowledge and experience. Since it has more to do with intelligence, it can be acquired and enhanced through training and experience.
Aptitude is more about management of a problem or a situation. While attitude is the way a person understands, perceives and responds to certain situations. It is more of a behavioural aspect and can be improved gradually via introspection and self-motivation. It cannot be quantified.
Attitude is related to existing abilities and skills with certain perceptions. It is how a person perceives something. Attitude is associated with character or virtues. It means attitude depends upon underlying values.
It has been observed that the people who keep on struggling in their lives lack the intention and thus the process of maintenance in life – be itself or machines or teams. If you maintain your team members by giving them professional freedom and care for their needs at the same time, they will develop and grow at great speed thus enhancing the productivity and profitability of your organization.
In the process, their worth has immensely increased and they are in the position to add high value to each and every project the organization you are working on. Perhaps the value addition made by them is worth 100 times the worth of fresh people joining your organization. When you maintain your machines well, these run for 20 years otherwise these run out just within 2 years. As a result of proper maintenance, you can imagine the tremendous growth in productivity and profitability thus in the process saving tremendous resources from being wasted.
The maintenance can be both proactive and reactive. Proactive maintenance is always the best as that happens through the visionary process defined before the performance starts. While preparation for reactive maintenance is also essential.
One must understand the clear difference between urgency and emergency. Emergency maintenance needs immediate attention and can be highly expensive. Urgent maintenance can wait for normal business hours and is possible only through the visionary understanding of thorough strategic planning.